That haircut makes the Royal Tern look like an elderly hippie who lets the little hair he has left get long in the back. You can almost hear the Grateful Dead playing in the background. You know that it only eats the organic, free range, locally sourced minnows that it finds in the dumpster in back of Whole Foods. It is embarrassed that it’s name has the word Royal in it and tells all it’s bird friends that it is in complete solidarity with the Common Tern. Dude.